StuPidwish Archives

Don't Read It

Words: mostly Henry
Music: Henry

This one's about things you shouldn't read. And some other stuff that rhymes.

Lyrics:
Chemistry textbooks - don't read it
The fine print - don't read it
The dead sea scrolls - don't read it
Roadsigns - don't read it

Chorus:
There's lots of stuff that you better not read
And the world is full of hidden dangers
So why not do, what your mom to you to
And never read from strangers

Nutritional facts - don't read it
Stereo instructions - don't read it
Braille - don't read it
Other people's minds - don't read it

Chorus

Bridge:
Reading is bad for you
Reading is what you better not do
Reading could cause your hidden end
Reading...please take heed
And never ever ever read
Or else you'll see the steeble will be remmed
Or else you'll see the steeble will be remmed

Silica gel - don't eat it
Auto parts - don't eat it
Auto people - don't eat it
Garbage - don't eat it

Chorus

Gremlins after midnight - don't feed it
Michael Jackson - don't beat it
Cookie dough - don't knead it
Guilty - don't plead it

Chorus

Bridge

Bonus:
Typing the lyrics to this just made me very, very happy. This song is brilliant in so many ways. Henry makes most of it up as he goes along. It also contains a version of the phrase "Rem the Steeble." I can't tell you what that means, but we used to scream it a lot. And it drove Big Al crazy. And that's the main reason why we did it.